Hearts fan crying over a penalty

February 8th, 2009 1 Comment »

Hearts were dumped out of the Scottish Cup this weekend by Yogi’s Falkirk.  In a game full of controversy (especially if you’re a Jambo), Hearts were awarded a penalty only to have it rescinded after the referee consulted his linesman who had had a better view.  Hearts fans have taken this as yet more evidence of a conspiracy against them and no-one was more upset than Paddy from Leven.  Paddy wasn’t content with making a total arse of himself on the Tartan Army Messageboard, he had to phone up Jim Traynor on Radio Scotland and make a total anus of himself on national radio by bursting into tears.  Oh, the emotion…..

Thanks to Tortohibby for putting this on YouTube.

Ukio Bankas struggling – shares plummet

October 8th, 2008 5 Comments »
Ukio Bankas Shares

Ukio Bankas Shares

Update – 04 February 2009

The latest happening appears to be that the Lithuanian government is, for the first time, going to confiscate money that was being laundered through a Lithuanian bank.  Which bank would be shady enough for that to happen I hear you ask?  Okay maybe not, it is of course Ukio Bankas.

Incidentally, if there was ever any wonder where the Christophe Berra money was going, now you know.

Update – 27 November 2008

There’s never a dull moment in Gorgie.  There appears to be yet more money problems as Hearts failed to pay their players again.  It happened in September and again last week.  They somehow scraped together enough to get the wages paid by the end of the day last week but this week they’ve failed completely.

Amusingly they haven’t used the same old “glitch” in the payment process excuse and have come up with an entirely new “blip” in the payment process excuse.  So, it would seem that everything is okay then.  Aye, right.

Basically, Ukio Bankas Investment group has failed to turn up with enough readies to cover wages, again.  What a shambles.

Hearts went on a bit of poor run of form after the last time they went without payment.  They beat Inverness 1-0 at home the day after then lost 0-3 to Dundee United, lost 1-2 Kilmarnock, drew the next two against Hibs and Aberdeen then lost 0-2 to Celtic before beating St Mirren.


27 November 2008

I’m not really sure what’s going on at Mad Vlad’s Madhouse now, not that I ever was.  It seems they met the debt repayment and are now being hailed as The fastest growing company in Lithuania. I’m guessing that’s pretty much hype to try to boost flagging shares but either way it seems the crisis may have been averted, albeit temporarily.  Hearts’ players even got paid last week.  Despite  waking to find there had been another “technical hitch”, the funds came through later in the afternoon from somewhere.  In better news, this page is now in the top half of the first page of Google for people searching “ukio bankas”.

Edit / Update

13 November 2008

Ukio Bankas shares continue to plummet like the proverbial lead balloon.

They are down another third this week as the lovely graph shows -

Ukio Bankas shares plummet

Ukio Bankas shares plummet

Is it bad for Hearts?  Who knows?  I doubt that it can be good.


Original Post

I haven’t done a “demise of hearts” post for a while so it’s about time.  Plenty has gone on since the last one.  There were rumours this week that Hearts were to go into administration on Wednesday 8th October.  These rumours have the same source as similar ones that have appeared every couple of months recently and there is some basis in fact.  The club were never likely to go into administration this week though.

Basically what happens is when Hearts don’t pay their bill, the company who is owed money starts legal proceedings and gets a court order to wind up the club.  The court sends notice to Hearts advising that if they don’t pay the bill by whatever date, the administrators will be sent in.  Inevitably, Hearts pay the bill at the last minute.  It happened the last few times and it’ll happen this time.

There have been other Romanov related rumblings this week, not least the fact that Ukio Bankas shares are in freefall.  Here is the graph from this week…

Ukio Bankas shares in freefall - graph

Ukio Bankas shares in freefall this week

And from one year ago…..

Ukio Bankas shares over last 12 months

Ukio Bankas shares over last 12 months

It would appear that all is not well. What effect this will have on Heart of Midlothian is difficult to say. There have been big problems in paying staff at the club and other parts of the Romanov empire appear to have been affected too. Ukio Bankas sold 5.12% of it’s shares to Medicinos Bankas UAB on the 2nd of October, presumably to raise some ready cash. It doesn’t look such a great deal for Medicinos and certainly hasn’t steadied the share price.

Aluminium companies have suffered greatly on the stock exchange recently and we’ve yet to see the full extent of the fallout from that.  Romanov owns a big aluminium plant in Bosnia which has been the cash cow of the Ukio empire and there was a report online that it was struggling just now although I’ve lost the link for the time being.

Hearts have put out a statement to the effect that everything is okay, nothing to see here. Just a few more “technical glitches” – aye right.

I spotted a George Foulkes photo caption thread the other day, some of the replies are pretty amusing.

George Foulkes

George Foulkes - "I'm sorry, my friend, but I have absolutely no recollection of having assaulted you."

Or, alternatively….

“Oi fatty……gonnae stay there for a minute so I’m not the stupidest looking erse in this photo”

“For the final time, I don’t have a hip flask and ye canny have a nip.”

“Champions of Europe within 5 years, Meester Foulkes – I promise.”

This little nugget was posted on HMFCkickback today:

“UBIG has invested quite a bit of cash in the Republika Srpska part of Bosnia Herzegovina in recent years.
It backed the huge Birac alumina plant at Banja Luka, which a couple of weeks ago gave up 98% of its capital to cover bad debts. Birac has also lost around 80% of its share value in the past year (from 30 to 6) and recently laid off 245 workers.
UBIG also founded the Balkan Investment Bank in Banja Luka, which manages the Balkan Investment Fund. This has poured cash into a number of major businesses in that area.
Its biggest fund placements have been in the aforementioned stricken Birac plant plus a bauxite firm, metals company and Srpska Telekoms. All have lost at least 50% of their value in the past 12 months.
The credit crunch means nobody is giving any more loans to UBIG or UKIO, which invested heavily in the property market in the Baltics and Russia – just before these markets crashed.
UBIG and UKIO have backed loser after loser. Now that the credit has dried up, they are having to account for their losses.
In recent days UKIO’s shares (which have nosedived over the past three months) have been among the highest-traded on the Baltic exchange — suggesting that the company is spending a LOT of cash trying to prop up its value. Yet the price of UKIO shares is still falling.”

Hearts FC unable to accept defeat.

August 28th, 2008 1 Comment »
hearts v's airdrie - wrong scoreline

hearts v's airdrie - wrong scoreline

Hibs were beaten this week by Morton in the CIS cup which wasn’t great.  Despite some poor refereeing decisions, Hibs were beaten by a team that tried it’s ass off and everyone accepts that Morton won.

But that’s not the case at Tynecastle where the mini-Huns, Hearts, were beaten by the mini-mini-Huns, Airdrie on penalties.  Hearts have been unable to accept this scoreline and the Hearts official website is reporting the game as a victory – 4-0 on penalties.

There are three possibilities here – they are deluded, they are incompetent or they are both.

Notice also the attendance for the “big team” – 6844

Sir Alex comments on the situation at Tynecastle

July 24th, 2008 No Comments »

In an interview to the Mail Online, Sir Alex Ferguson came out with the following:

DO you think that as more and more clubs are bought by foreign billionaires, you are going to see more interference by them?

Aye, you are going to get interference more and more from a manager’s point of view. I think there are signs of that. I mean the guy who owns Hearts takes the team out to the manager.

Save Our Hearts 2 – Jambo Special

June 26th, 2008 2 Comments »

Heart of Midlothian Football ClubThere are murmurs among the discontented but apathetic Hearts support that there might be a return of the Save Our Hearts campaign which was in full swing when Chris Robinson planned to sell Tynecastle to Cala Homes and move the club to Murrayfield.  It’s been discussed in private on Kickback and they have now made the discussion public.

Here’s my suggestion:  Get a time machine and continue the campaign from when The Pieman left the club.

I think it’s difficult for fans of any most clubs to believe that Hearts fans have done the square root of bugger all since Vladimir Romanov ripped the soul from their club and made them the laughing stock they are.  Some of them still think he’s going to pull through and build a stadium, wipe the debt and win them the Champions League.

Anyway, I support the efforts of the few Hearts fans who are actually attempting to do something, they should be applauded for attempting to save the club they (misguidedly IMO) follow.  It’s easy to sit and mock from afar when your own club is in secure financial shape with a benevolent if not exactly inspiring owner (and I should know) but remember 18 years ago, Hibs went down a similar road that Hearts are on now.  It took the efforts of the Hands Off Hibs campaign to avoid being taken over by someone who was happy to wipe the club out.  The point is that the fans have to make that effort.  Who knows, it might not be too late for the Jambos to save what’s left of their club.  Time marches on though…..

In other news, Romanov’s chief attack dog Charlie Mann is to part company with Mad Vlad.  His employer, Weber Shandwick “are to cease any involvement with Hearts’ majority shareholder from the end of this month.”  Public Relations will now be dealt with in-house.  No reason given, make up your own but first here’s a quote from Mr Mann in 2007, “Don’t worry, things aren’t as bad as you fear…. When you see people like me walking away, that’s when to worry!”

Strangely, Charlie will be part of the panel, along with Hibs Blog favorite George Foulkes for a Talk 107 debate/discussion/pagger about Hearts on Friday 11 July from 6.30pm.  It’s going to be live so let’s hope George Foulkes is in his usual state.

Finally, I’d like to report on the imminent departure of Shaggy Fail but Hearts managers getting the heave-ho is hardly news is it?